"General Kayani takes Ariel view of operation Rah-e-Rast"
You can imagine my surprise when I saw this poetic heading in The News. I mean, who would ever have thought that literary demons lurked inside our chief of army staff? And that too of such a Tempest-uous nature?
Of course, nothing of the sort was actually true. The excited click-through yielded only the most banal of news items about F-16 trips over Swat and the like. Chalk one more up to the unerringly jaahil sub-editors and worse proof-readers who still can't spell aerial...
But it got me thinking: what if this heading were true? What if, in the middle of the "fight for Pakistan's survival" and the drive to "uproot militancy from the country", COAS Ashfaq Pervez Kayani were, in fact, channeling Shakespeare? What if, he were taking an "Ariel view of Operation Rah-e-Rast?"
Would he be saying to the public still ambivalent about the Taliban: "If of life you keep a care,/ Shake off slumber, and beware:/ Awake, awake!"
Or in an address to the jawans: "While you here do snoring lie/ Open-eyed conspiracy/ His time doth take."
He could even send out a message to Baitullah Mehsud: "Being most unfit to live. I have made you mad;/And even with such-like valour men hang and drown/ Their proper selves."
Of course, he could also express the army's abiding distrust of politicians thus: "Before you can say 'come' and 'go',/ And breathe twice and cry 'so, so,'/ Each one, tripping on his toe,/ Will be here with mop and mow."
Please feel free to add more Ariel quotes at leisure. May Pakistan Prospero.