Tuesday, December 7, 2010

A Challenge To Tut-Tut

So here's the deal Syed Tut-Tut Hussain. I might have simply ignored your live interview on CityFM 89 tonight (which I happened to catch completely coincidentally) with its mealy-mouthed self promotional bits ('I could never have been in the armed forces because I hate hierarchy and checkposts...but I am the only civilian to have flown in an F-16'). I might even have let go without a comment the fact that the interviewer, Wasim (or whatever his name really is) Wes Malik, actually referred to you as "the great Talat Hussain." After all, can't really hold it against a radio presenter and a FM channel for trying to do a promo for an employee of the parent company (Dawn Media Group). Yes, I might have disregarded it all, had you displayed even a wee bit of contrition or even embarrassment when a questioner asked you about that Jolie article.



Honest?


But see, when you blithely claimed that the entire controversy was caused "by the [incorrect] translation" of your article by people "unaware of the nuances of Urdu" ["Jin ko Urdu zabaan ke asloob se nashanasayi hai"], you really got my goat. Now Wes Malik may have found that line completely incomprehensible (he went "What???") but some of us do know a little bit of Urdu and the flowery language Urdu columnists sometimes employ. And in particular, what galled me (incidentally, saying something "gets my gall", as you said about checkposts, is incorrect usage of the term) was that I had gone out of my way to stay true to your meaning and awkward style. I could have cherry picked the quotes but decided to be fair and translate the entire piece and it took me a bloody long time. Neki kar, dariya mein daal.


So I'd like to throw you a challenge. Point out, or get anyone to point out, where in my English translation I deviated from the original sense and style of your Urdu piece and I will willingly tender you an apology.

You also went on to say in your radio interview that 1) you could never think of dissing Angelina Jolie and that you actually quite like her as an actress (Mr and Mrs Smith being your idea of 'good acting') and 2) that you were in fact praising her for being brave enough to tell off the Pakistan government for its obsession with protocol etc during the humanitarian disaster of the floods.

Since Wes either had no clue or was too polite to say anything about those two statements, let me remind you with respect to 1) what you actually wrote about what you thought of her acting:


"This 36-year-old woman has suffered all those misfortunes about which her fans (I am not one of them) are all praise [sic]… Because her looks were average, she couldn’t make much of a mark in acting."


With respect to 2), it boggles the mind that you continue to spread this canard when the UN itself has subsequently denied anything of the sort - as originally only reported by The Khaleej Times - ever happened. Here's Newsweek Pakistan from its November 1 issue:


"Claims that Jolie, who came to Pakistan in September on a two-day tour of flood-hit areas as UNHCR's goodwill ambassador, had complained to the U.N. agency about Gilani are "baseless and inaccurate," UNHCR spokesperson Arianne Rummery told Newsweek Pakistan. Jolie has not filed any report on Pakistan yet, she added."


For those who think - as some did last time - this has anything to do with 'defending' Jolie, it doesn't. I'm just sick and tired of people (particularly journos) twisting facts to bolster their ideological arguments. And I'm especially irritated by Janus-faced hypocrites, you know, the sort that Tut-Tut decries on his programmes and in his writings all the time.

Oh, and Talat, that on-air rant about the "dark side of the blogosphere", where people come at "conservative journalists" like you like "snipers", and the need to "control and moderate... some of the stuff being written about our anchors" (" I won't say censorship but...")... Pure genius.




29 comments:

ayesha5 said...

Ha! What a liar Talat Hussain is! He thinks those who blog in English don't know Urdu.

I did read that article a couple of times before writing a blog about it. It was pathetic and attacking to the core.

TLW said...

Sniper, eh? Call me Vasily Zaytsev.

TLW said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Fifi said...

To be fair, in terms of tactics (as opposed to honesty) how else could Talat Hussain have defended himself? He didn't have a chance in hell with any other explanation, did he now?

Apology? Since when has any public figure in Pakistan ever admitted a tiny mistake, let alone a gargantuan one?

Now how did he know you'd be listening to City? He didn't but he was hoping. Because he probably wants to project you as a English speaking type who listens to English type radio stations in his next column.

I say take him up on it. Declare open war. Can we pre-apply for front row seats?

Ullta Seedha said...

Hmmm ... so the 'attacks on conservative anchors' through some blogs has started to hurt these buggers?

Lovely. These fuckers actually think that they should be able to continue getting away (nay, be hailed as heroes) for spreading lies and hatred.

Get 'em.

Ullta Seedha said...

@Fifi
You, my fair lady, suffer from the same dialemma other progs like Beena Sarwar suffer from: You guys are nothing like the hate brigade that rules the roost at Geo/Jang, and yet you both are continue to stay there, either ending up being apologetic about the madness that emits in the name of TV journalism, or simply going round in circles trying to defend vicious little men we call 'TV anchors' in this country.

Fifi Haroon said...

@very ulta

1. How behind times are you? I left GEO more than a year ago!

2. If you read my post more clearly you will notice it is full of sarcasm. Far be it from me to defend Talat Hussain's column. I was actually mocking him.

3. If you would however like me to be more literal, I believe his column was somewhere between misinformed, petty and downright reprehensible.

Anonymous said...

@fifi, "somewhere between" three things? :)

Fifi said...

Okay, okay lets make that somewhere between dumb and dumber. Will that do? :)

Anonymous said...

talat hussain is a douche bag. dawn's values are down the gutter especially after they lost a billion rupees with their "understand the difference" anglash experiment. bringing in douche bags like talat, and bimbos like the chick who does morning show....sheesh. if content is anything to go by then dawn is down in the gutter. then they have self proclaimed chefs running around. is this where salvation lies? i think not. i'm deeply offended by talat hussain's attitude towards women and am boycotting dawn period.

Anonymous said...

Talat Hussain is a lying prick. He's not the only civilian to have flown in an F-16. Dozens of civilians have flown in F-16s of air forces around the world. Even if he was referring just to the PAF, he's lying. Several civilians have flown in a PAF F-16, and I've even heard the Vital Signs got a ride while shooting the video for "Aisay Hum Jiyein."

Talat needs to fuck off forever.

Anonymous said...

Cafe Pyala, u always target Talat sab but don't write anything about Zaffar Abbas or his brothers like TLW... dal main kuch kala to nahi, bhai?????????????????????????????

thekarachiwalla said...

This interview was so funny that I drove an extra mile to listen to it. whattay wanna be he is.

AKS said...

Is it my imagination or has Wes Mallick's angrezi accent gotten more pronounced?

Cafe Pyalee said...

Poor Dawn newspaper, having to bear the burden of Dawn News.

How come we see leading Dawn writers like kamran shafi, irfan hussain and nadeem paracha on dawn News TV?

Why did they have to settle for "oh-us-poor-conservatives" like Talat.

Who's next? Shahid Masood? javed chaudhry?

Cafe Pyalee said...

Sowie
I meant: How come we DONT see leading Dawn writers like kamran shafi, irfan hussain and nadeem paracha on dawn News TV? :P

Anonymous said...

TALAT HUSSAIN is a closet SHAHID MASOOD.. Does this make sense? To me it does :)

Nasir said...

@Anon 223, Zaffar Abbas brother is a serving General while poor Talat is just a working journalist.

Is it clear now why Cafe Pyala is silent regarding the Abbas brothers?

Bolshevik said...
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Bolshevik said...

Yaar yeh bunda ubb wajib-ul-chhitter hochuka hai. Mazaaq k baghaer.

Qehar Alood said...

Nasir, this is typical off the wall criticism. You want cafepyala to judge Zaffar Abbas's performance and integrity on what his brother does. Unlike Talat, Zaffar Abbas isn't infatuated with the military establishment and in sync with Shuja Pasha's (ISI's) world view. Pahleeeeeze give me a break!

Anonymous said...

you are just jealous of Talat. after all, he is a star and you are a sorry blogger, not having any moral courage to come out in the open and dissing every one

karachikhatmal said...

two things.

first of all, it has long been implied in the blogosphere that cafe pyala ARE the abbas brothers. in which case a blog post on themselves would be rather narcissistic.

secondly, and i think this is important, it is heartening to see that bloggers in the english-liberal-beghairat-amreeka loving part of pakistan have had an effect on mainstream-common man-salt of the earth-urdu loving moral majority. it means that we are moving towards a dialogue, and that can only be a good thing. instead of having our own little bitch fights in blogger comment boards, we're moving towards a larger debate. cafe pyala (or abbas brothers) we're all really really proud of you for making us feel that our blogs are slowly but surely leaving their mark. if only i could figure out how to burst this elitist bubble surrounding me, my redemption will be complete.

Anonymous said...

@ karachikhatmal

i can't stop myself from laughing out loud.... :):):):)

Anonymous said...

Hahahahaahahahhaha..
Tut-Tut...
Hahahahahahhahahha... Good one...!!!

Anonymous said...

Tut-Tut or (as Tazeen says) Toilet... :-)

Ali said...

I wonder what happened to the Dawn News because they have also hired Mr. Riffat Saeed alias Tooti as its Anchor, there is an FIR of attempted murder registered against him in Police Station Stattion Mubina Town Karachi [circa 1990], he is a Former Member of Thunder Squad and used to be in Editorial Board of Weekly Takbeer Karachi. By the way he is a Right Hand Man of Idrees Bakhtiar of BBC and Herald. Nowadays Riffat is Unofficial PRO of Rehman Malik.

Anonymous said...

cafe piyala is a gutter zone of u aall worms r living here. failed ,dissapointed,prick ppl! ur life is just curse successers and crying .shitt!

Anonymous said...

To the bloggers here EVERYONE is doing gutter journalism...except for the high on crack gibberish writing dick NFP!

I wonder why everyone is so pissed at AJ being dissed. Big fucking deal...